I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
