She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize