OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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