we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Acid is not a monday night drug
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
