Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
