apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Houston, we have a blender
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
