i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
