yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
