Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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