Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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