you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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