i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize