Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize