There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I could fuck to npr.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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