don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
