Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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