I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize