is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
