Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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