school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize