as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
