thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
either way he was missing a nipple.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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