Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
