i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
She announced her abortion via fbk
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
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