Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
All the doctor said was why
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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