You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
His hands were made for my vagina.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize