do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize