Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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