u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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