I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
