I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
you traded sex for a burrito?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
