You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
