Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize