whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
