Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
