i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
