i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
