Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize