It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize