Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
