He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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