He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Randomize
