she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
