I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
