our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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