You just made me feel so damn special
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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