Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
