No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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