hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
