At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
