yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
