BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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